Father

This past week, I have been overwhelmed with what it means to be a child of God. 

Charles Spurgeon said, "God's people are doubly His children. They are His offspring by creation, and they are His sons by adoption in Christ." What a beautiful truth, that we should be called the sons of God not only because it is His breath that gives us life, but also because it is His sons blood that paid the bride price. Just as in marriage, we have been given a new name and our groom is building a home eternal. The beauty is that only our groom's father will know when the house is complete, and he isn't just the father in law, he is the one being who knows our every thought, every step, every heart beat. How glorious this house must be!

I live with 62 children who are radically loved and desired by this same God. They are twice the child of a perfect Father, and though they may not have earthly parents yet, they have been chosen two times by the giver of all good things, the redeemer of their souls, the rescuer, the King. I live with royalty. What a beautiful image of the Kingdom on earth. 

Charles Spurgeon goes on to say, "Abba, Father! He who can say this, hath uttered better music than cherubim or seraphim can reach. There is heaven in the depth of that word—Father! There is all I can ask; all my necessities can demand; all my wishes can desire. I have all in all to all eternity when I can say, 'Father.'"

There is heaven in the depth of that word -- Father! I cannot imagine the deep joy that must be felt by God when He hears His children say his name. I cannot imagine music more beautiful than angels can make. But I do understand that last part. Everything I could ever need or ask for is found in my Father. I have everything to the full from now until eternity if I can just say Father. 

So my friends, rest in the knowledge of being twice wanted, twice chosen, twice loved. 

Rest in the knowledge that if you can just say your dad's name, you will have your all in all for all eternity. 

Trials, temptations, and troubles will arise, but when you know who your Father is, you shall never be wanting. 

There is so much I could say about this Father, so much I could say about what it means to be His, but my desire today is that we just dwell with our Abba and smile with Him, knowing that we are His forever. 

Constant

Life at Beautiful Gate is anything but constant. Each day is a roller coaster of activity and emotions. 

Some days it is so easy to find the joy in life here: in the giggle of a child, a baby standing for the first time, playing in kiddie pools, praising Jesus at the top of our lungs...

Other days it is much more difficult. You feel defeated, unworthy, unequiped. Kids won't stop pulling your hair, the baby just keeps crying, you get thrown up on...

But what I have realized in my twelve days here is that, no matter how my day is going, The Lord is always drawing me in and saying, "Gracie, stay here beside me."

Psalm 92 says, "It is good to give thanks to The Lord."

1 Thessalonians says, "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

Now, Psalm 92 doesn't say, "It is easy to give thanks to The Lord," and 1 Thessalonians doesn't say, "Give thanks for all circumstances." But rather it is good to give thanks through all that we endure, for in this life we will have trouble, but God is so much bigger than that.

So give thanks in all things, not because it was all good or all from God, but because God is good and and he is there in it all.

Life at Beautiful Gate may not be constant, but I rejoice in saying that I am walking along this path with the God of unfailing, steadfast, and constant love, hope, and joy.

Here at Last

With heavy eyes, heavy bags, and very tired bodies, we rolled onto campus around midnight on Friday. 

After disappointing setbacks and a few boring days trapped in Michigan with all the snow, we finally made it. 

My first two days were spent relaxing and recovering from jet lag, meeting kids and housemothers, and simply taking it all in. I went to church with Brian and Anita and was so encouraged by it. Their theme for the year is to be difference makers, and I was reminded in the midst of my fears that God is not looking for perfect people. He is looking for people who know they are not perfect but are willing to do a perfect job. Many doubts have crept in...feelings of inadequacy mostly. But to be reminded of the omnipotence of God was so refreshing. He planned this long before I could ever imagine it, and he made it just right. 

This morning I met the administrative staff and joined them for devotions. We read about Abraham sacrificing Isaac and were struck again by his great faith and trust. Genesis 22:5 exemplifies it best when Abraham says to his servant, "You wait here. The boy and I are going there to worship, and then we will come back to you."  Even then he knew God must have had another plan. He took Him at His word and knew he was to become a great nation. My roommate Christina (or Terp as we lovingly call her) said that life is like a dance with God. We need to trust that he know what he is doing, and we must let him lead. If we don't, we end up stepping on each other's feet and instead of becoming a thing of grace, beauty, and celebration, it becomes messy, chaotic, and ugly. These next six months are bound to have difficult dances in them, and I don't think I am always going to want to go where He leads, but how good it is to start this journey with that image and goal of obedience in mind. 

Today I was assigned to Pula 1, one of the five baby houses. I met my housemothers, started getting to know my kids, and began the work that will be my life for these six months. It was overwhelming at first. There are a lot of kids, a lot of names I cannot say or remember, and just a lot to take in, but it was good. My heart has already begun melting for those little ones. They love without any hesitation. Though we cannot speak well to each other and we don't even know each other's names, they were so excited to hold my hand, sit in my lap, put their arms up to be held, and give me spitty kisses on the cheek. (The first child I met on Saturday was so excited that she immediately wanted to be held, and then proceeded to pee on me. Initiation is complete.) Everyone has been so welcoming, so joyous. The children are beautiful and happy. Their laughter is like the brilliance of sunshine. It warms your very soul. 

Thank you all who are praying. I am so touched by the support I have been given. My hope is to write once or twice a week. 

With much love...

Here We Go!

Well, this is it. My countdown is now to the hour.

I am ready. I really am. But that doesn't make leaving the one's you love any easier. I have always heard and believed it to be true, that if saying goodbye is hard, it means you are saying goodbye to something really good. Something worth coming back to. I am so blessed by the great cloud of witnesses I have supporting me in the States. It is so comforting to know that people want to be a part of what God has called me to. 

I can't wait to see how The Lord works. I know His ways are immeasurably higher than my ways, and though that really scares me, it really excites me too. I have real fears, real doubts, but God has proven Himself faithful.

We sang the song "Oceans" today in church, and the words rang so true that faith may fail, and fear does surround me, but God has never failed and He won't start now. What a beautiful promise.

So I'm going in faith. I'm going with trust. All I know about my life is that I'm leaving tomorrow. 

But that is so good. This journey is no doubt an adventure with my Savior and I wouldn't want to be doing it with anyone else.

Prayers for travel would be much appreciated. The winter weather is not in our favor...

Much love,

Grace Marie